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My favorite Sundays are when I entertain and this golf ball corkscrew has been held in the hands of almost every brunch guest who’s ever been over here. It’s as close as anyone will get to a golf course around here as the only use I have for golf balls and clubs are as bar accessories as seen here or as found objects in my art and sculptures. Like this series of Arnold Palmer Golf Hat & Coat Racks I made in 1987.

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Judging by the vast number of both vintage and new bar accessories that incorporate golf equipment I’d say the liquor industry has to be pretty happy with this sport!

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Only 5″ long and less than 1″ high, this solid brass puppy weighs a ton. For years he sat on my desk atop my most important notes, making me less resentful of going through the stacks of papers he kept in place while I procrastinated going through them every day. One day he fell on the floor and I noticed how strangely shaped his little feet were. Only then, after almost 20 years of being a paper protector, did I realize the dachshund was, in fact, a bottle cap opener on his front legs and a can opener in the rear.

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Discoveries like this make me very happy. It seems like I have a brand-new object in the house! He’s definitely hand sculpted – be careful around his sharp butt! – but his polished smooth body makes him very fun to handle and easy to operate. I do miss him guarding my papers but he seems much happier in his new and more exciting role.

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The package reads “Let’s try homeparty fashionably and have a joyful chat with nice fellow.” And all it takes is a straw! For years after I co-wrote the Friends theme song I received gifts that had the word ‘friend’ as part of their title. Without question, these Fujinami flexstraws are one of my favorites. Who could resist sucking on such sage advice? 

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Between Van McCoys’s huge 1975 hit, “The Hustle”, and the proliferation of that decade’s gay clubs and discos, especially in New York and LA, negative connotations of the word ‘hustle’ and its older sister ‘hustling’ melted away in a fog of polyester shirts and glitter eye shadow to become one of the most popular colloquialisms of the day. ‘No Hustling Allowed’ was printed on jean patches, underwear and, thankfully, this mirror as well as anything else that could be sold in a catalog, novelty or souvenir shop.

This baby stands proud at 4″ x 8.5″ and was made in 1974 by Wallace Berrie & Co. of Van Nuys, California, makers of  rubber statues, wall plaques and other like-minded toys and promotional items.

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These Party Pics were all the rage in the 1950s – women poised to fulfill male fantasies, their high heels spiking popular canapés like Pigs In Blankets, Bacon Wrapped Olives and other fanciful party faire born in modern kitchens powered by the postwar Atomic mentality of style and convenience. 
My favorite thing about these Pickers is how the end of the women’s hair pokes out from behind her shoulder almost looking like another arm. Or maybe the end of a scarf. Or maybe just another sharp point to spike a raisin, caper or some other miniscule hors d’oeuvre enhancement.

These Party Pickers were all the rage in the 1950s – women poised to fulfill male fantasies, their high heels spiking popular canapés like Pigs In Blankets, Bacon Wrapped Olives and other fanciful party faire born in modern kitchens powered by the postwar Atomic mentality of style and convenience. 

My favorite thing about these Pickers is how the end of the women’s hair pokes out from behind her shoulder almost looking like another arm. Or maybe the end of a scarf. Or maybe just another sharp point to spike a raisin, caper or some other miniscule hors d’oeuvre enhancement.

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Poodle anything  almost instantly qualifies as Kitsch. This one is a double K because for years I thought it was a pitcher until I finally went to use it and the canine started hemorrhaging lemonade from its back. I was upset because I’ve never noticed any hairline fractures but upon closer examination I discovered it wasn’t a pitcher at all but, rather, a bank!

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I find the heavily detailed ceramic and wobbly head a rather odd choice for a children’s toy and lay odds on it breaking within the first five uses or whenever a silver dollar’s dropped inside, whichever comes first.  But with a little putty jammed in the coin slot I still think it would make a lovely pitcher.  Since that discovery about 10 years ago it’s just been a lovely nothing, something for my cat Niblet to rub herself against every now and then so I can take these cute pictures of her.
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I’ve collected four of these porcelain pitchers from the late 1960s over the years. I’ve only seen this particular style with the casual, beaming Afro-endowed hostess on the front, never the matching male, so perhaps Canadian Club was making a pitch to the swingin’ middle-class lady set that things other than water and lemonade should be pouring out of their petite white pitchers. 

I’ve collected four of these porcelain pitchers from the late 1960s over the years. I’ve only seen this particular style with the casual, beaming Afro-endowed hostess on the front, never the matching male, so perhaps Canadian Club was making a pitch to the swingin’ middle-class lady set that things other than water and lemonade should be pouring out of their petite white pitchers. 
I always liked that the blouse they chose for this hostess was so bold yet conservative, picking up enough of what they perceived as a ‘Right On/ That’s Soul, Baby!’ feeling but still looking like it could have been bought at any department store in the white suburban malls. 5-1/2″ high by 3-1/2″ high and made in the USA, at least Canadian Club’s sprang for printing the image on both sides of the pitcher. Nothing bothers me more in household accessories, especially things like glasses and pitchers where how you pick them up depends on whether you’re right or left-handed, when the image is only stamped on one side. Nothing less expressive for this the happy hostess who writes this blog then drinking out of something that is blank on the side exposed to the public. I’ve collected four of these porcelain pitchers from the late 1960s over the years. I’ve only seen this particular style with the casual, beaming Afro-endowed hostess on the front, never the matching male, so perhaps Canadian Club was making a pitch to the swingin’ middle-class lady set that things other than water and lemonade should be pouring out of their petite white pitchers. 

I always liked that the blouse they chose for this hostess was so bold yet conservative, picking up enough of what they perceived as a ‘Right On/ That’s Soul, Baby!’ feeling but still looking like it could have been bought at any department store in the white suburban malls.

5-1/2″ high by 3-1/2″ wide  and made in the USA, at least Canadian Club sprang for printing the image on both sides of the pitcher. Nothing bothers me more in household accessories, especially things like glasses and pitchers where how you pick them up depends on whether you’re right or left-handed, when the image is only stamped on one side. Nothing less expressive for the happy hostess who writes this blog then drinking out of something that is blank on the side exposed to the public.

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Meant to “add a little spice” to your food, this kind of risque-but-not-really stuff was all the rage in the 1950’s and 60’s. Sixteen plastic pics that hold canapes together featuring quips like “Lovers Leap – the distance between twin beds”, “Madam – one who offers vice to the lovelorn” and “Bachelor apartment- a wildlife sanctuary”. Many of them are a peek into how different attitudes toward sex were in decades past, like “Patience – the difference between rape and seduction.” Yikes. To think things like this were stuck into bacon wrapped olives and toasted Cheese Whiz baloney puffs…

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I’m not a drinker but I love vintage bar accessories and drag the best of them out when I entertain on weekends. Nothing is more popular than these pipes that hug a bottle and through which the liquid drains when it’s tipped.

Made in 1961 by Poynter Products Inc. Cincinnati, Ohio, Plastered Plumbers’ slogan is “The whiskey goes ’round and round and round and r…”. This scores an extra notch on the Kitsch belt not only for excellence in concept and slogan but because the the first ’round has an apostrophe in front of it while the rest of them remain bare. Not to mention that the first roun is missing a D. Perhaps diminished capacity on the part of the art director after sampling the product accounts for the diminished punctuation.

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MLK-matches-V

I have tons of MLK memorabilia – busts, rugs, pens, cufflinks, ashtrays – but this book of matches is one of my favorites. Comes in a matching set with Jackie Robinson, Mahalia Jackson, Dr. Ralph J. Bunche, Lorraine Hansberry, Zora Neale Hurston, Paul Laurence Dunbar and Bill Pickett.

I, thankfully, have found three sets of these over the years so have slowly struck the first MLK, © 1976 Universal Match Series 1, which is down to three matches and counting.

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