Everything about this clock is wrong, not the least of which is trying to get away with looking like it comes from McDonald’s when it’s actually from the M. A Collection in China whatever that is. Made of chunky hard rubber yellower-than-mac-’n-cheese-made-with-3-pounds-of-Velveeta yellow french fries popping out of a red fry bag…
…with a not quite centered clock in it, I got this as a gift in 1995. I’ve never changed the battery and for 15 years have watched the little yellow hand twitch as it tries to push itself past the 12. Apparently more money was spent on the batteries than making the clock.
Although it’s completely hollow the french fry clock weighs a ton. Literally, it weighs over 4 pounds and I can’t figure out why. And there’s this strange bowling pin shape etched into the back…
…with no apparent purpose other than the designer apparently liked the shape.
Although one might assume it would pop out so it can be hung, unless you consider hiring a pile driver to pound it out there’s no way that sucker’s leaving the lead-heavy rubber anytime soon.
Despite its shortcomings or maybe because of them I’m strangely and loyally attached to this clock. Many things have come and gone in my kitchen since I owned it but the fries ain’t goin nowhere (mainly because they’re too heavy to lift).
| Share this page. |
|
Subscribe to the blog. |
|
|
|
|
Categories:
Food,
Furniture and Housewares,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day
Protected under a Creative Commons license
Of all the things I have in my house, a 40 year collection of Atomic, Soul and Kitsch memorabilia, this rubber waffle that’s sat out on my kitchen counter since I bought it in the 1980’s is one of the most popular things in the joint. Made by Iwasaki Images of America, the premiere display food manufacturer in the world, this waffle looks so drippingly, syrupy and buttery real even I’m tempted to chomp a bite out of it every now and then.
Categories:
Art,
Food,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day
Protected under a Creative Commons license
When I was a kid I was SO into Leave It To Beaver, probably as much because of the glow from the Sylvania Halo Vision tv I was watching it on and the Velveeta sandwich on white with one thin leaf of Iceberg draped across it that was the ritual meal of my childhood. I’m sure I’ve seen every single show of the original series that ran from 1957-’63. I was also into Lassie, My Three Sons, Dennis The Menace and other series that showed life from a kid’s point of view but I always liked Beaver because he was so inquisitive and annoying.
Categories:
Art,
Crafts,
Food,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day,
Place
Protected under a Creative Commons license
I can’t think of anything Coke would go better with than a nice slab of liverwurst! Not sure what inspired anyone at the company to pick this meal combo to advertise the drink but I’m awfully glad they did because this 8″ x 24″ Litho cardboard sign has hung happily in my kitchen for almost 20 years. I’ve never done it the honor of munching down liverwurst when I pop the cap on a Coke but the sign inspired me enough that my alter ego, Bubbles the artist, painted a beautiful still life of the meal in 1999…
Categories:
Advertising/ Promotion,
Bubbles the artist,
Crafts,
Drink,
Food,
Furniture and Housewares,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day,
Sign
Protected under a Creative Commons license
When Vanessa Williams snagged the Miss America crown in 1984 one of her first honors was to grace this box of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes. But the box was banished as quickly as her title when sexy photos emerged. Ironic when the text includes lines like “It is with this intent that Kellogg Company provides this limited edition Commemorative Package as a lasting reminder that…we must continue to promote the American dream and encourage all Americans to freely pursue life, liberty, and happiness.”.
Categories:
Advertising/ Promotion,
Afro,
Famous,
Food,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day,
Music,
People
Protected under a Creative Commons license
Corn is a popular motif in salt and pepper shakers but usually it’s the stalks of corn themselves. Here we have a happy corn couple, born of ceramic, ready to shake at human request. Despite the fact that most salt shakers have more holes than their pepper mates, this 3″ green textured guy and gal’s holes are as perfectly matched as their outfits. They were both born around 1950.
Categories:
Food,
Furniture and Housewares,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day
Protected under a Creative Commons license
“The dessert that tastes like a candy bar” was a junk food lover’s xtreme fantasy when it hit the shelves in 1972. Short-lived – it was gone by ‘73 – Jell-o Spoon Candy was a puddingish dessert with a topping you cracked through as you would the chocolate shell on a Dairy Queen. Spoon Candy, a kitschingly brilliant name especially when combined with the word “jello”, came in a variety of combo flavors like peanut butter and chocolate, chocolate with chocolate, vanilla with chocolate, caramel with chocolate, I guess chocolate came on everything. The topping inhabited a separate package stuffed into the box that you cut and squeezed onto the pudding.
Categories:
Food,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day
Protected under a Creative Commons license
I’ve been collecting Shriners artifacts since I found a group portrait of hundreds of Zurah Temple members in their Fezes in the mid-1970s looking like little lined up Pez dispensers. I never knew the difference between Shriners and Masons or what either of them really did. I just like any organization that has hats, pins and a super-costumed regulated look. My alter ego, Bubbles the artist, has even honored them in her popular “The Funsters Of Zurah Temple” line of collage art, ceramics and paintings.
Categories:
Accessories,
Food,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day
Protected under a Creative Commons license
This is the only version of this festive holiday treat (or torture, depending on how you look at it) that I can stand having in my house. I would sooner eat this plastic version than the real thing as fruitcake is one of those things that my tongue has never adjusted to. Made by Accoutrements and billed as “the fruitcake they’ll actually want to eat”, the package includes everything you need to send the flatter-than-pancake thank-God-it’s-not-real fruitcake to those you love (or hate) this holiday season.
Categories:
Food,
Holidays,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day,
Toy
Protected under a Creative Commons license
World’s first “Chewy nutrition snack – you carry them… they carry you!” Developed for astronauts, Space Food Sticks went to the moon so a year later when Pillsbury knocked out jerky looking logs of chocolate, peanut butter, carmel and chocolate malt, earthlings sucked them up by the bushel full. This is the pamphlet and a hefty 10 cents off coupon towards this pre-Jolt, Red Bull “sustain the energy lift” space stuff.
Categories:
Food,
Kitsch,
Kitsch O' The Day,
Outer Space
Protected under a Creative Commons license
