Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 007 Rubber Bands

No mention of James Bond, no mention of Sean Connery, no mention of anything other than the fact that these are 007 Superior Quality Rubber Bands. All of which means the only thing secret agent about this is the bootleg nature of the product.

If I were a big James Bond collector I might feel ripped off, but being a kitsch collector I’m completely ecstatic! The more bastard the product, the more magnificent the kitsch pedigree.

The rubber bands themselves are pretty special. They’re listed as multicolored but I think that’s stretching it a bit given the paucity of color allotted to each.

The manufacturer didn’t even get it together to give themselves credit on the box. Perhaps so Agent 007 can’t track them down for copyright infringement. The only information at all on this 3″ x 3″ cube is that it’s “Packed by Tin Tin Bizarre, Inc.” Tin Tin Bizarre sounds like a great name for a Bond girl. Aside from that,everything about this product’s identity and MO is strictly top secret x 007.

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Categories: Celebrity, Film, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Memorabilia, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Giant Vintage Hanging Foam Sex Dice


Not the normal pair that dangle from the rear view mirror, these 6″ soft dice feature sexual maneuvers on one game piece and the body parts to which they are to be applied on the other. The dice look nice and clean but seeing as they came from a thriftshop I’d suggest surgical gloves before tossing them and letting fate decide your next move. Which could be any of the following…


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Categories: Games, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Romance, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Kitschy Khristmas Shopping List #2

99¢  and discount stores in general are fabulous all year round but there’s no question that the season they shine most at is Christmas, when all stops are pulled out and the shelves are packed with more crap than even a kitsch loving aKitschionado such as myself can absorb. These stores at this season offer the perfect storm of circumstances for me, especially as I needed some Christmas arts and crafts supplies to make Pigmy Will Christmas ornaments.

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Categories: Celebrity, Fashion, Furniture and Housewares, Holidays, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Pigmy Will, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Kitschy Khristmas Shopping List #1

Last weekend I drove down to San Diego to see a performance of my musical, The Color Purple. I rarely get a chance to see the show but when it’s anywhere near LA I choose which performances I’m going to see by which town has the best thrift shops and then I make a whole trip out of it. For this performance I mapped out all the second hand shops between LA and San Diego. But we left too late so dealt with the shopping jones in one antique mall in Solana Beach on the way to SD. I especially love antique malls this time of year because the Khristmas Kitsch comes out in full force.

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Categories: Animals, Art, Celebrity, Crafts, Holidays, Pigmy Will, Place, The Color Purple, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Mr. Peanut Bank And Friends

Although I’m not a massive fan of actual peanuts, I’ve always loved classic 1950′s plastic Mr. Peanut memorabilia. I love how the plastic glows with depth from the richness of the classic 50′s colors he came in, in this case perfect baby blue.

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Categories: Brands, Drink, Financial, Food, Furniture and Housewares, Kitchen, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Politics and the National Rooster Crowing Contest Trophy

When it comes to an award for crowing the loudest, that should go to politicians. If I get enraged by the money that movie stars make imagine how insane I go seeing the money that’s dumped into political ads on TV that tell us almost nothing about the actual goals of who made them. I don’t want to hear anyone crowing when they throw hundreds of millions of dollars away on campaigns. Do some real good and give that money to saving school systems or cities from going bankrupt. Neither Meg Whitman or Carly Fiorina, the loudest crowers of all in the election yesterday, deserve any prize, which is exactly what they got for dumping all that cash down the drain. I don’t like to hear the other politicians crowing either, and I really don’t want to see any ads about ballot measures which, despite their cheesy production value, cost a fortune to shoot and are never clear about what the measure is really about.

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Categories: Animals, Awards, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1969 Vintage Chess Men


I never learned how to play Chess. Checkers was way more my speed, especially as I loved the sound the vintage wood ones made as you plunked them down on the board. Plastic ones sounded good too and that was about as complex thinking as I was willing to ponder when it came to games. My standards were always based on design, what sound do the game pieces make, how do they feel texturally, how’s the color palette, etc.  Mind  you, I love the sound these plastic Chess Men make clicking together too. But for Chess you also have to burrow way deep into your brain to strategize about where to move them and I like to reserve those deep recesses for things like writing songs, painting and knowing the quickest routes to local thrift shops.

One thing I could always wrap my brain around though was excellent packaging. And the color technique for cheap, stripped down, straight-to-the-point things like Chess was excellent in 1969 when this was made.

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Categories: Games, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Kahlúa “Udderly Delicious” Glass With False Bottom

There’s absolutely nothing right about this insanely cheesy Kahlúa “Udderly Delicious”plastic glass which, unfortunately, there’s no way of taking a photo of and showing all the brilliance of at once. At first glance, it’s just an incredibly cheap cup with the Kahlúa logo and some cow spots painted on it. Plus the excellent “Udderly Delicious” slogan. But then you peer inside and see the creature that the udders belong to with a nice frosty drink on its head and two toy bottles, one of which is unmarked, which makes no sense for something that’s a promotional item, rattling around inside on top of it.

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Categories: Animals, Brands, Drink, Forgot to Categorize, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Toy

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Allee Willis’ “The 365 Days Of September” – Day 13

sept-http-www.youtube.comwatch-v=oppTbbw0j3k

In this Lego Star Wars recreation, “The galactic civil war is finally over and peace has been achieved. The surviving members of the Empire have reconciled and joined the party. But what to do in this time of happiness? DANCE!!!”  This stop motion dance fest proves that Fenderboy105 is a better Lego builder than choreographer, though his attempts are noble.  The little Star Wars cast does their thing but without any sense of rhythm or editing to accents or tops of verses and choruses, the kind of things dancers wait for to spike their expression.  An admirable effort to be sure but with a greater musical sense this could’ve elevated to a higher universe.

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Categories: 365 Days Of September, Brands, Film, September, Songwriting, Toy

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Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – The Wibbler!

wibbler_3216

Despite the fact that The Wibbler is guaranteed “fun for all ages”, the last thing I’m about to do is jump on this thing and start to wibble. All it is is a brittle piece of vacuformed plastic that you stand on with no strap to hold your feet in position and then start to tip every which way. I would bet that rather than having fun more people ended up with broken ankles and chipped teeth from their wibbling activities. This is probably why I never heard of The Wibbler before and why nothing shows up in a Google search for it. Which makes me treasure this toy that’s “scientifically engineered and built like a bridge” even more. Would you want to drive across a bridge called The Wibbler?

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Categories: Consumer Alert!, Dance, Games, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Party, Toy

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