Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Japanese Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste

toilet-seat-paper-cover_2381

I love Japanese convenience products born out of blended east and west needs and Pop Culture, especially ones by way of Vietnam as this toilet product is. In this case, not only are the translations awkward but the product is too. You affix these strips that look somewhere between oversized sanitary pads and shoe inserts on the rim of your toilet seat and then peel them off after you remove your “bottom”, only to use them again the next time you rest on the porcelain throne. Apparently, this saves you the trouble of washing the toilet seat or worrying that you’re going to be sitting on someone else’s nasty stuff. I, personally, would still be concerned as I don’t want to be bending over the facilities trying to flick up the end of some reusable Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste. And what does that name mean anyway?

toilet-seat-paper-cover_2374

Are the pads/shoe inserts that are looking more and more like strips of sticky fly paper a toilet seat cover or are they paste? I don’t know that I want to be hovering over the bowl to come to a final decision. Besides, the full name of the product appears to be Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste Well Type with Pattern. This would take an entire day of sitting on the toilet to try and figure out and I have a feeling that more solid fact would end up in the toilet than in my head.

One of my favorite things about this product is the slogan that equates a toilet with life itself.

toilet-seat-paper-cover_2377

I haven’t really found that there’s that direct of a relationship between the two.

“Unlike a conventional toilet seat, installation and removal is very easy.”

toilet-seat-paper-cover_2376

Well, uh, yeah, a toilet seat is an actual part with some weight and mechanics involved ensuring functionality and stability whereas the Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste Well Type with Pattern is just two confusing strips of paper that forces one to make contact with the actual toilet seat while assuming that perhaps the person whose “bottom” occupied it before you did not have the benefit of owning their own Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste Well Type with Pattern. This is not where I would want to be placing my hands to retrieve my fly strips.

toilet-seat-paper-cover_2373

For cleaning, just rinse with warm water. However, to most efficiently dry your seat covers one must find a “spin-drier” as opposed to using “a drying machine”.

toilet-seat-paper-cover-instructs1

What is a drying machine? A microwave? I don’t know about you but I don’t want anything I just pulled off my toilet anywhere near where I tweak my food.

It also says that if you choose natural drying you must keep the strips in the shade, paying attention “not to allow dust on the backside”.

toilet-seat-paper-cover-instructs2

It seems to me that the whole point of the strips in the first place is “not to allow dust on the backside”.

Further instructions for correct usage of Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste Well Type with Pattern prove just as confusing as the name of the product itself. “Do not use clippers since use of such items results in traces on the absorption surfaces”.

toilet-seat-paper-cover-instructs4

I would be constipated by the time I really figured out what that meant.

And then there’s this: “be careful when washing or drying the sheets with the absorption surfaces facing each other that they do not permanently adhere together”.

toilet-seat-paper-cover-instructs3

Am I supposed to get inside the spin-dryer with the strips in order to prevent this?

All in all though I’m happy to own the Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste Well Type with Pattern as it goes very nicely with what’s hugging my toilet right now, the “Warm Cover Of Toilet Bowl”, another toilet sensation from the Orient.

toilet-seat-paper-cover_2379

.

Thank you, aKitschionado Margaret Lewis, for your generous contribution of one Paper Toilet Seat Cover Paste Well Type with Pattern to The Allee Willis Museum Of Kitsch at AWMOK.com!

Share this page.   Subscribe to the blog.
Bookmark and Share
 


Categories: Accessories, Bad translations, Bathroom, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Toilet Paper Cozy

toilet-paper-cozy_2141

If one were to pick up doing crafts as a hobby one of the easiest things to make would surely be this happy little gal toilet paper cozy. A ratty piece of fake fur stitched together with a plastic doll head and adorned, if you’re lucky, with a little satin bow and some kind of cheap necklace, usually with the glue the ‘jewels’ are nesting in sloppily poking out of the sides.

READ MORE »


Categories: Accessories, Bathroom, Hair, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Vintage Sweetie Soda Bottle

Sweetie-soda_1913

I’m not sure what flavor of liquid came in this bottle but the Sweetie logo featuring an early ’50s extra-pert secretarial type sucking on a straw that looks more like a striped cigarette would have had me buying this drink no matter what it tasted like.  Beautifully designed with the concentric circles on the pyro-glazed logo echoing the raised flanges of glass above it, the aesthetic effects of this squat little 8″ Sweetie bottle would make anything taste good.

READ MORE »


Categories: Art, Drink, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Diver Plunger

Plunger-diver_6664

Ten years old and Italian, this diver plunger is only about half the size of a normal one but performs his duties ably. Although I’m not about to plunge it into a toilet because of its diminutive size, it rests under the bathroom sink where my cat, Niblet, loves to drink water and waits patiently for hours until I dole out a few drips. As cute as that is, her fur eventually clogs the pipes and it’s then I reach for the diver, always perfectly poised to make the plunge. He delivers every time!

READ MORE »


Categories: Bathroom, Furniture and Housewares, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – “The Fist” Air Freshener

fist-air-freshener_6467

This goldplated bejeweled hunk of plastic air freshener is without question the greatest of its ilk I’ve ever seen.  I, thank God, had the presence of mind to buy the entire stock of two when I saw them at a Pic ‘N Save in the mid-90s and one rode around on the dash of my ‘55 Studebaker Commander until I just couldn’t take the glut of sticky sweet strawberry fumes any more.  Which was a blessing in disguise as I almost killed myself several times when the glare from the sparkling gold multifaceted fist almost blinded me.

READ MORE »


Categories: Accessories, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products, Sculpture

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – ‘Real Silk’ with Real, Chance & Luenell

real silk_6239

Anyone who knows me knows I love Reality TV.  Of all the contestants on all the nutty dating shows I went especially nuts over Chance and Real, aka Ahmad and Kamal Givens aka The Stallionaires, real-life brothers and finalists 2 and 3 on season one of VH-1’s I Love New York. I liked them so much that I co-wrote and co- produced the theme song,  “Does She Love Me”, to their spin-off VH-1 show, Real Chance of Love, with them and younger brother, Micah.

READ MORE »


Categories: Afro, Celebrity, Hair, Health & Beauty, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Music, Place, Products, Reality tv, Songwriting, TV/Radio

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Happy President’s Day! – Obama Chia Pet

chia-obama_5873

In the kountry of Kitsch, there’s no higher honor bestowed upon a President than that of being commemorated as a Chia Pet. Now Chia Obama joins Chia Washington and Chia Lincoln in achieving that honor.

READ MORE »


Categories: Afro, Crafts, Forgot to Categorize, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Political, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1960’s Ponds Cold Cream

ponds,-jergens_1964

Seeing as the Lustrous Lipstick display was so popular yesterday I moved my vintage Ponds face cream up in KOTD status to grace the shelves at The Allee Willis Museum Of Kitsch today. Along with Jergens, Ponds ruled the middle class moisturizer market in the 1950’s, 60’s and 70’s. Growing up, I don’t ever recall going into a friend’s house whose mom didn’t have a jar of this stashed next to the cotton balls.

READ MORE »


Categories: Advertising/ Promotion, Health & Beauty, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products, video

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1970’s “Disco Beat” Earring Holder

disco-Beat-earring-holder_2785

One of my favorite genres of Kitsch is when objects are produced to take advantage of a massive trend in pop culture but actually have nothing at all to do with that trend.  My next favorite genre of Kitsch is when the products themselves are impractical for the use they were created to serve. This “Disco Beat” earring holder qualifies on both fronts! The bouncy,  clean cut 1950’s American Bandstand bobby-soxers would have never gotten into the 1970’s disco-beated Studio 54 and the zillion holes provided to dangle earrings from makes for too crowded of a surface to effectively hang more than a couple sets of earrings without them hanging over each other and coalescing into a tangled mess.  All of which makes for one hell of the fantastic Kitsch product!

READ MORE »


Categories: Accessories, Consumer Alert!, Dance, Disco, Forgot to Categorize, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Music, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Max Factor Sophisti-Cat Perfume

kitty-perfume_2240

Made from 1954 – 1960, possession of a bottle of Max Factor Sophisti-Cat perfume was de rigueur for any little girl growing up in ’50’s and ’60’s. My kitty is brown with pink rhinestone eyes, a pearl choker and a white feather that constantly gets stuck to the cardboard covered velveteen, fake suede or whatever this little pussy is made out of.

READ MORE »


Categories: Animals, Health & Beauty, Kitsch, Kitsch O' The Day, Products

Creative Commons License
Protected under a Creative Commons license